Thinking Thoughts

sometimes i just sit and think about the universe
if humanity is a blessing or just curse
if god really cares if you were sprinkled with water at birth
or if your hole god damn body has to be immerse
have you ever thought if life didnt exists
if there was none of this
what would it be
just a dark abyss
im i the only one that thinks like this
would we still be intelligent and think thoughts
have no one to be with, or lots
would we have bodies to move or mouths to talk
sometimes i think so hard i swear my brain rots
so stuck in my head i cant even go to bed
thinking if id rather be dead
put a gun to my head
pull the trigger and fill my thinking brain full of lead
but im to big a coward or id already be dead
im just so scared of whats after suicide
i guess what im trying to say is before you dis-side
just think, you might not like whats on the other side
and you cant hide behind suicide if you've already died